Transmission Wire

One way to make your wedding more memorable could be to have a theme wedding.

Taking the decision to have a theme wedding is the easier part. Deciding on the theme is harder. You could decide on a 17th century theme or a dream wedding theme, but while considering these themes, it is important to consider certain factors liIf you are looking for a fresh look theme, look at your wedding date. Every season has its own charm and you could have a seasonal theme for your wedding that would incorporate all the glory, colours and beauty of the nature around ke cost, availability personnel etc.

you. It could be memorable and unique in its own way.

Many people like to get married in late winter or early spring when nature is at its best.

In spring everything looks fresh and new after the winter’s sleepy hibernation. In spring gardens and parks are in full bloom and the colours of nature are in full swing. Shades of pastel adorn the landscape with myriad shades and romance blossoms with a new haste and height. Having a spring season theme for your marriage would evoke the same feelings in your guests albeit to a lesser extent… (No-one can compete with nature… can they?).

Spring colours for the bridesmaids are pastel shades, each a different colour would create a different look. Tables with snowdrops or daffodils… miniature ones of course would give a fresh look. Back it up with tulips adorning the décor. Fill old fashioned jam jars with fragrant candles for a garden ambience. You could add flavor to the wedding by adding pink champagne to the afternoon tea and organising dance entertainment with Morris dancing for the adults or an Easter Egg hunt for the young.

Another popular season for wedding is the Summer, June, July and August being the most preferred months owing to the warm sunshine and reduced chance of bad weather. The colour patterns of summer are spicier compared to the pastel shades of spring. A summer theme should aim to create a tropical ambience through the use of yellows, bright orange, lime green and hot pink colour themes. You could spice it up by making the bridesmaids wearing clothes of vibrant colours and more so, if they carry an exotic tropical flower different from each other and different from the normal bouquet offerings. Have the wedding breakfast in the garden incorporating barbecued fish and lime. A steel band can set the guests on fire with fun and relaxing aesthetics.

Autumn might bring some challenges to your creativity. Flowers are less abundant and the colours are down to earth with a mix of browns, gold, rust, coppers and reds. Substitute the flowers you carry with dried grass, wheat and berries, mix it up a little. Keep the food simple - soups, home made bread, fruits, cheese and roast meat. Halloween and romantic background music can work wonders with the ambience.

Winter, considered dull by some, can be the most is a magical time for weddings. The dark and cold nights could be converted to a warm ambience by use of candles, twinkling lights. Winter is when family gatherings have a special meaning and signals festive times. White, silver and blue are apt colour for a winter wedding theme. Adorn the bridesmaids with silver and turn the flower girls into little fairies with all the works - wands and wings. Tables can be adorned with white feathers and the best sweets and chocolates available, light them with indirect blue lights. Serve white chocolate with the proper adornments to get the best of the winter ambience.

Whatever the season you choose, a little creativity in the theme can go a long way in making your wedding the most memorable ever.

Jane Martin is the founder of http://www.weddingplansecrets.com/ which offer inside secrets from within the wedding industry as well as more advice on Theme Weddings.

Comments Off

Recent statistics suggest that 40% of women (and that number is increasing) and 60% of men at one point indulge in extramarital affairs. Put those numbers together and it is estimated that 80% of the marriages will have one spouse at one point or another involved in marital infidelity.

That may seem like a very steep number. However after two decades plus of full time work as a marriage and family therapist, I don’t believe that number is off the charts. I worked with a great number of people involved in infidelity who were never discovered.

The possibility that someone close to you is or soon will be involved in an extramarital affair (any of the three parties) is extremely high.

Maybe you will know. You will see telltale signs. You will notice changes in the person’s habits and behavioral patterns as well as a detachment, lack of focus and reduced productivity. Maybe you will sense something “out of character” but be unable to pinpoint what it is.

It is not a given that he/she will tell you. Those hiding the affair will continue to hide. The “victim” of the extramarital affair often, at least initially, is racked with anger, hurt, embarrassment and thoughts of failing that preclude divulging the crisis.

It might be important to confront the person with your observations, depending on the status of your relationship with the person.

It is important to understand that extramarital affairs are different and serve different purposes.

Out of my study and experience with hundreds of couples I’ve identified 7 different kinds of infidelity.

Briefly, some extramarital affairs are reactivity to a perceived lack of intimacy in the marriage. Others arise out of addictive tendencies or a history of sexual confusion or trauma.

Some in our culture play out issues of entitlement and power by becoming “trophy chasers.” This “boys will be boys” mentality is subtly encouraged in some contexts. Some become involved in marital infidelity because of a high need for drama and excitement and are enthralled with the idea of “being in love” and having that “loving feeling.”

An extramarital affair might be for revenge either because the spouse did or did not do something. Or the revenge may stem from rage. Although revenge is the motive for both, they look and feel very different.

Another form of infidelity serves the purpose of affirming personal desirability. A nagging question of being “OK” may lead to usually a short-term and one-person affair. And finally, some affairs are a dance that attempts to balance needs for distance and intimacy in the marriage, often with collusion from the spouse.

The prognosis for survivability of the marriage is different for each. Some affairs are the best thing that happens to a marriage. Others serve a death knell. As well, different extramarital affairs demand different strategies on the part of the spouse or others. Some demand toughness and movement. Others demand patience and understanding.

The emotional impact of the discovery of infidelity is usually profound. Days and weeks of sleeplessness, rumination, fantasies (many sexual) and unproductivity follow. It typically takes 2 - 4 years to “work through” the implications. A good coach or therapist can accelerate and mollify the process. I don’t recommend “marriage” counseling, at least initially.

The devastating emotional impact results from a couple powerful dynamics. Trust is shattered - of one’s ability to discern the truth. The most important step is NOT to learn to trust the other person, but to learn to trust one’s self. Another is the power that a secret plays in relationships. THE secret exacts an emotional and sometimes physical toll that needs to be acknowledged and dealt with.

How can you help?

Those in the midst of their affair crisis told me they need this from you:

1. Sometimes I want to vent, get it out without censor. I know sometimes I will say what I shouldn’t be saying. It may not be nice, pretty or mild. Please know that I know better, but I need to get it off my chest.

2. Every so often I want to hear something like, “This too shall pass.” Remind me that this is not forever.

3. I want to be validated. I want to know that I am OK. You can best do that by nodding acceptance when I talk about the pain or confusion.

4. I want to hear sometimes, “What are you learning? What are you doing to take care of yourself?” I may need that little jolt that moves me beyond my pain to see the larger picture.

5. I may want space. I may want you to be quiet and patient as I attempt to sort through and express my thoughts and feelings. Give me some time to stammer, stutter and stumble my way through this.

6. I want someone to point out some new options or different roads that I might take. But before you do this, make sure I am first heard and validated.

7. When they pop into your mind, recommend books or other resources that you think I might find helpful.

8. I want to hear every so often, “How’s it going?” And, I may want this to be more than an informal greeting. Give me time and space to let you know exactly how it IS going.

9. I want you to understand and welcome the ambivalent feelings and desires. I would like you to be fairly comfortable with the gray areas and the contradictions about how I feel and what I may want.

10. I want you to be predictable. I want to be able to count on you to be there, listen and speak consistently or let me know when you are unable to do that. I will honor that.

Extramarital affairs are powerful. Affairs are costly. They affect family, friends, colleagues and employers. Infidelity is also an opportunity - to redesign one’s life and love relationships in ways that create honor, joy and true intimacy.

Dr. Robert Huizenga, The Infidelity Coach, has helped hundreds of couples over the past two decades heal from the agony of extramarital affairs and survive infidelity. Visit his website at: http://www.break-free-from-the-affair.com

Comments Off

Planning a wedding and keeping your sanity is not an easy task. Everyone knows that planning a wedding can be an extremely stressful and trying time, especially as the big day approaches.

One of the most important details of the wedding is the actual wedding date. This is usually the detail that is taken care of first. Factors in choosing a date include the availability of the venue where the wedding will take place and availability of friends and family on the assigned date.

It is also advisable to set a budget before you start to make plans. This way you’re able to organize the details according to your budget.

Some venues where weddings are held offer discounts on days when traditionally, weddings are not held. Also, the time the wedding takes place also becomes a factor in the expense. For example, mornings and afternoon receptions are usually cheaper than receptions held in the evening.

Venues can offer discounts depending on the time of year. Just after the holidays could be a good time to hold a wedding if you are considering the cost. This time is not considered a ‘peak time’, therefore the price tends to be less expensive.

It’s important to talk to your fiancée about the size of your wedding. Your dream wedding might not be your fiancée’s. So it’s necessary for you to discuss details such as the location of the venue/reception, the number of people who get invited to the wedding/reception, and the choice of entertainment.

It’s important to reach an agreement on the guest list. If you want to keep the wedding an intimate affair, only family and/or friends would be invited. If you wanted to have the wedding of the century, friends and family, long lost relatives, the whole neighborhood and high school buddies could be invited. When making the guest list, consider the space capacity of your chosen venue.

It’s a good idea to hire a professional to capture this momentous occasion. Sure, your friends can take good pictures and some of them may own a camcorder. But for this special occasion, you would want something special, lasting, and visually presentable. This way you could also share them with your friends and family.

Don’t forget the cake! It’s a good idea to have a tasting first, before settling on a cake. Invite your family and friends for the cake tasting. This way, this task becomes fun for everyone!

Order wedding invitations. If you want to get creative, you can always print your own. This way, you can customize them, and add a more personal touch to the invitation.

Don’t forget to start looking for a wedding gown months before the wedding so the bride has plenty of time to make a selection. Also, the groom should make arrangements to rent or buy a tuxedo preferably in advance in case there is trouble with the fitting.

Couples who don’t have enough time on their hands or just find the preparations that go into planning a wedding too overwhelming can always just hire a wedding planner. This way, everything gets organized and coordinated for them. But if you decide to go the wedding planner route, don’t forget to add this cost into your budget.

Susan Jones loves wedding planning and sharing her knowledge with others. For more exciting information on planning your dream wedding, visit Wedding Secrets Online today!

Comments Off

A wedding consists of basically four elements: gathering, ritual, vows, and celebration.

The traditional wedding ceremony derives from a combination of ancient cultural practices and church liturgy. Marriage itself has a less-than-romantic history in much of the world until more recent times. The union of bride and groom inspired by friendship, love and devotion is a concept that only began to form about 500 years ago in Western cultures. Even then, marriages of choice that followed a lengthy courtship were a luxury of the aristocracy. Marriage was usually a purely social and political contract, controlled in every way by church, state, and extended family.

Within this deeply conservative framework, women in particular had very little leeway, and no economic or political power. Historically, women were considered property of their husband. In traditional marriages even today, women vow to “obey” their husbands. In England and America, for example, until even as recently as a century ago, if a woman’s husband were to die, she was left entirely dependent on her husband’s family, who took ownership of all of her own family assets.

While some couples find their greatest support following traditional marriage ceremonies, an increasing number of couples are designing unique and personally meaningful weddings that reflect a more innovative spirit. Sometimes these thoughtfully designed ceremonies simply alter certain aspects of more traditional weddings while others break the mold entirely. For example, it was common until recently for the bride’s family to pick up the tab for the wedding. Many couples today share the planning and expenses of the wedding and even draw equally from their respective traditions. Ceremonies involving combined liturgy, or, for example, both a priest and a rabbi, are common. Fifty years ago, this combination would have been taboo among most people.

The gathering of witnesses is from one’s community, but what if one’s community is outside of any traditional church, synagogue or mosque? Some couples have chosen to create beautiful ceremonies that go farther back in time, to the goddess and earth religions that predate the patriarchy altogether. Ceremonies held at sacred sites, scheduled according to the lunar calendar, and incorporating a respect for the powers of nature, sometimes conducted by modern-day shamans or priestesses, have become more common.

These ceremonies can be legally officiated by ministers who are not affiliated with a particular denomination, or who are broadly ecumenical in their own spiritual practice. Uniquely individualized approaches can be incorporated by writing original vows, which reflect one’s deepest sentiments. Much careful reflection often goes into the composition of vows that best reflect the deep contractual commitment the bride and groom are making.

Sometimes, couples who desire an innovative wedding get married legally by a local magistrate at the county courthouse, and then hold a more alternative ceremony among family and friends.

The “Green Wedding” movement is an interesting cultural phenomenon that has been gaining increasing momentum. Careful planning goes into every aspect of a Green Wedding ceremony to ensure that environmental and social justice is upheld. Catering for the reception features locally-grown and organic food. The typical gift registry is partially or entirely replaced by a list of non-profit environmental, community, and political organizations to which the bride and groom request a donation as their gift. Many Green Weddings are community projects themselves, featuring the talents and contributions of a wide network of friends and family. This emphasis on both the local and global community reflects the bride and groom’s desire for the marriage itself to be a force for positive change.

Wedding rings are a lasting and meaningful way for the bride and groom to express unique aspects of their commitment to each other, while at the same time embodying their spiritual, political, and environmental values. Conflict-Free diamonds, that is, diamonds certified as being mined and distributed free of bloodshed and oppression, are in ever greater demand. Celtic wedding rings, with a variety of organic and beautiful patterns and symbols, carry multifaceted spiritual and symbolic meaning. While the exchange of rings is of course a long-standing tradition, the variety and craftsmanship available today is unsurpassed, and many couples make certain the rings themselves incorporate, as a lifelong reminder, the values and meaning woven into their uniquely creative wedding ceremony.

The most important thing when planning one’s wedding is first and foremost, make it your day. Decide where you will compromise and where you will not compromise. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Let go and celebrate the beginning of a new journey.

Peter Breslin is a musician, astrologer, Tarot reader, teacher and freelance writer for Artisanweddingrings.com and Celticjewelry.com living in Santa Fe, New Mexico. He has taught mathematics, music, writing, and literature in the course of a 20-year teaching career in Pennsylvania, New York, New Mexico, and California. Writings include a variety of pieces for publications online and otherwise. He is currently at work on a novel.

Reflective Images can be found at:
http://www.artisanweddingrings.com

http://www.celticjewelry.com
For a free full color catalog contact us at:

marek@celticjewelry.com

Comments Off

You’ve been asked to be best man at a wedding. What an honor! Someone clearly thinks very highly of you - you must be quite the guy.

Flattered to the hilt, you happily agreed, but now that you’ve gotten yourself into this, you realize you may not be entirely sure what you supposed to do as the best man. Just what exactly are the responsibilities of the best man?

Yeah, I know, you’re usually a pretty confident guy, but now you’re feeling just a touch nervous and a little unsure of yourself. Maybe you haven’t been to that many weddings, and if you have, I’m betting you weren’t carefully studying the best man. The maid of honor, maybe - but not the best man. No doubt you had much better things to do!.

So now that you’ve been selected to wear these shoes, you’re feeling uneasy…You don’t want to come off looking foolish, and you don’t want to get anything wrong.

Chill, honey. This is going to be a piece of cake for you. We’ll run you through everthing you need to know, and you’ll pull it off with class and ease. You’ll be the man of the hour by the time you’re through this little crash course. A real confidence man.

Let’s take it from the top, shall we?

What is a best man?

The best man is the person selected to “stand up for the groom” at the wedding. The best man must be of legal age because he also serves as a legal witness to the marriage. (Remember, apart from all the wedding hoopla, marriage is a legal contract!).

During the ceremony, the best man stands next to the groom (to the groom’s right side). If there are other male attendants (ushers or groomsmen), they will stand to your right side.

If there is no ring bearer for the wedding (the little guy who carries that frilly little pillow onto which the rings are sometimes tied), the best man may be asked to hold the rings during the ceremony until the big moment comes for the couple to exchange vows and rings.

Since the best man serves as a legal witness, towards the end of the ceremony you will accompany the bride, groom, and maid or matron of honor (who is also a witness), to witness the signing of the legal documents.

At the conclusion of the ceremony, the best man escorts the Maid or Matron of Honor up the aisle, following directly behind the bride and groom.

As you exit the church, you will stand with the bride, groom, and other bridal party attendants to pose for photos.

If all of this seems a little overwhelming or difficult to remember, don’t worry - it will all be carefully explained, and you’ll get the chance to practice it, and ask any questions you may have, at the wedding rehearsal a day or two before the wedding.

The Right Man for the Job

So who should be a best man at a wedding? If you are asking this, you’re second guessing yourself pal. The groom picked you because you’re the man! He knows what he’s doing, so relax.

The best man may be the best friend of the groom, or a buddy of the groom; he may be a brother, step-brother, or close cousin of the groom; he may even be the father or the step-father of the groom - which, in this wedding expert’s personal opinion, totally rocks (who could be more deserving of this honor than dear old Dad?).

What are the duties of the best man?

Let’s start with the best part first, shall we? If you’d like, you can host a stag party for the groom. I bet I don’t need to explain what that is. Keep in mind that stags are optional; you are not obligated to host one, but you may do so if you wish - and IF the groom does not object to the idea. (No, really. Some guys don’t want a stag). You might also ask the other male attendants in the wedding party if they’d like to host it with you, but they too are under no obligation. It’s strongly recommended that you discuss your intentions with the groom before making any firm plans for a stag. Some guys have agreements with their brides-to-be that there will be no stag party, and others have made promises about the types of activities which will and will not be involved. This can be a very touchy issue for many brides-to-be, and today many grooms, of their own free will, simply prefer to keep things pretty tame and mellow. The last thing the best man should be doing is creating upset between the bride and groom, so remember, talk to the groom-to-be about the types of activities that he is interested in, and determine what will be acceptable.

Attend fittings for tuxedos or suits at the scheduled time.

Attend any pre-wedding meetings or parties for the wedding attendants.

Attend the wedding rehearsal, and rehearsal dinner (that part is easy, just show up and enjoy!).

On the day of the wedding, arrive at the groom’s home prior to the ceremony to provide him with moral support, and ensure he gets to the church on time!

Hold on to the wedding rings and the marriage licence prior to the ceremony and guard them with your life! Make sure you have these prior to leaving for the ceremony. If the couple will be leaving for their honeymoon directly after the reception, you may also be asked to hold any plane tickets for safe keeping until the couple is ready to depart the reception.

Hang on to the payment for the ceremony officiant (the minister, rabbi, or other religious officiant, or the judge in the case of a civil ceremony) as well as payments for any ceremony musicians (organist, soloist, string ensemble, etc.), and ensure everyone gets paid at the end of the ceremony.

You may be required to stand in the receiving line either immediately after the ceremony or at the start of the reception. Sometimes the best man and groomsmen are excused from participating in the receiving line - this will be the couple’s call.

It is traditional and customary for the best man to make a toast to the groom at the reception. If you are so inspired, at your option you may also toast the bride, or toast the bride and groom together as a couple. No raunchy stories please - this isn’t the time or place. The groom’s grandma and great Aunt Alice will be there. Not to mention his new wife. Keep it classy.

Sometimes the best man is also asked to serve as Master of Ceremonies (otherwise known as the MC) at the reception, while in other instances, someone totally different may fill this role. If you are asked to MC, at the appropriate time, usually following the meal, you’ll have the job of introducing the bridal party seated at the head table, and of announcing special guests (like the brides great-great-great-great grandma), or out-of-towners. At the appropriate time, you’ll announce any of the individuals who will be proposing a toast or making a speech. You’ll read any telegrams that have been sent to the bride and groom from out-of-town guests who could not attend, and you’ll make any other special announcements that are passed on to you. Now don’t let any of this get you uptight - the bride and groom should provide you with written notes and instructions to prompt you on who to introduce and what to announce, you won’t be expected to memorize it! Once the dinner portion of the festivities is over, and the party really starts to get under way, all MC tasks are usually taken over by the DJ or band leader, freeing you up to party down!

Hang on to the payments for the vendors who will be providing services at the reception, and disburse the vendor payments to the appropriate individuals at the end of the reception.

Help the bridal couple make a smooth exit at the end of the reception. Ensure that a car will be waiting for them, or drive the new Mr. and Mrs. yourself (only if you’ve been sipping nothing stiffer than soda-pop throughout the evening, otherwise leave the driving to someone sober).

Other miscellaneous responsibilities:

You may be asked to run the occasional errand, help in decorating cars or the reception room on the wedding day, or other such small tasks. The couple will let you know if they are in need of any of these sorts of favors from you.

What expenses is the best man responsible for?

As the best man, you’ll need to cover the cost of your wedding day attire - tux or suit, shirt, tie, appropriate dress shoes. Generally the couple will choose the attire for you and the other wedding attendants, but it’s still up to you to pay for what you’ll wear. The couple may have you and the other attendants rent tuxes (which will generally run you between $50 - $100), purchase new suits, or, in the case of a less formal wedding, an easy going couple may allow you to wear a suit you already own (assuming you have one which is appropriate), but don’t hold your breath on that one!

Like any other wedding guests, you’ll also need to budget for a gift for the happy couple, if you intend to give them one. Etiquette says that gifts at a wedding are never “required”, and should never be expected by the couple. However, though wedding gifts aren’t mandatory, they are somewhat customary, so do what feels right for you.

If you don’t live in the same city or town where the wedding is taking place, etiquette requires that the couple cover accommodation expenses for attendants who must travel to participate in the wedding (but you pay for your own transportation). Now brace yourself here; not every bride and groom today is as up on their etiquette as they should be. If your bride and groom seem oblivious to the fact that this is the proper thing for them to do, you can always send them to this article to give them a gentle heads-up.

There it is in a nutshell. With all this info under your belt, you’ll pull this gig off like you’ve done it endless times before. Now there’s just one last instruction… Enjoy the wedding!

by Linda Kevich

Editor, SuperWeddings.com

Comments Off

February is coming, and it will bring the day of love with it.
Most of the lovers are already planning for the day.
What gift to give, where to meet, what to do to make the day more romantic than any other day?

Why and how is Valentine’s Day celebrated?

No one quite knows, why it is celebrated, but it surely makes a big difference in life of lovers. This is the most important day for lovers. They all go mad in love on this day,and can think of nothing but how to please their beloved. It is recorded that business of jewelry takes a big jump during February. So does the business of flowers,candies and cards. Every other gift that can be thought of is bought across most of the countries of the world and is sent to the beloved.

What about others?

Valentine’s Day may be the most important day for those in love. What about others? Let us take a look at today’s world. Wars, terrorism, fear, murders, and every other destruction that can disturb a peaceful life is the norm. Open a newspaper, watch news on television or read it on Internet, the disturbing news is getting predominance. It depresses the common person in the world. Isn’t it? What does a common person think of
the future of such a world? Can anyone be optimistic? Can anyone visualize of peace dawning around the world, countries co existing in peace with each other and no ethnic wars being fought anywhere?

What does one look forward to in such a world? I think that most of us have become so numb with disturbances, both man made and natural that we have stopped thinking of future. For a large majority it is “let us try to live peacefully today”.

Valentine’s Day and the world peace -

With so much destruction going around,, shouldn’t one welcome a day, when love reigns supreme? A day, when hatred and destruction takes back seat and one only thinks of love? What if we begin a new way of celebration? Begin sending love messages to our enemies. Begin talking of love and peace and try something that can reduce our conflicts with others? Why keep the day confined to romantic love. Take a step forward and make it a day to make every human being love another. Irrespective of race, nation, religion, etc. Break all the outer barriers and try to touch the heart of all we can? Can this be done? Let us at least think of Valentine’s Day as a day, when all the hatred and enmity is forgotten and it is the song of love that is played around. Is that not a
big contribution of this day? That is why it is so important.

Mohatta writes about different aspect of life. Love, inspiration, pains, humanity, truth etc. He is currently dedicated content writer for http://www.screene.com network. One of the websites for which he writes text for the eCards, Wallpapers and Screensavers is http://www.romanticdesktops.com.

Comments Off